Cyberdramas.
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.

I've always been such a loner,living inside my own head.I have always..or perhaps,nearly always, lived with my own confusion and pain.I don't know if I'm coming out of that now..or is it just an illusion created by the internet?
Suddenly I'm trying to belong to forums and stuff like that and it means identifying oneself to others.How does one do that when one is not even sure of one's own identity anyway?
Seems like people identify others through their likes and dislikes..and this,normally,seems to imply books and films and the like..Books in the area of fiction and films in general,have so quickly bored me most of my life,that I don't really know what to say..but I've started to put stuff down..just for the sake of joining in.
Joining in..that's new for me..maybe because it is 'faceless' on the net ..though becoming more and more visible ..
Then there's the technical side..for someone who's never been able to make head or tail of a bus timetable or read an underground map straight ..let alone remember what day of the week it is..I suppose I'm not doing too badly...but ...
well,it does seem to take me ages..endless attempts until the light dawns(am I being objective here?!)..
It's just a couple of things like..well..I can't seem to suss out how to make a new topic work on the forum I belong to for some kids discussing films,books,telly,newspapers etc etc ..and it rather takes the steam out of an amusing little aside if I have to write to the 19 year old administrator to ask how to do it!
Never mind..
Then there was the Technorati thing..I've seen it before..but picked up on it with more interest today through a link to The Traceless Warrior blog..looks interesting..but giving me a bit of a headache knowing if I really want to use it and how..(just tags or join up).
So I decided to get real and leave the old lappie for a while..after all I've been pissing around with this thing for ,what?..12..15 hours a day for yonks now and ..apart from being bad for my health ..back,posture and ruining my eyesight..I'm beginning to get wierd kind of mushy headaches..No good all this!
Yes..I know..I'll go and get Bilquis's medecine..and have a break and then come back to it..
Would you believe it?Two of the four new kittens, which the mother cat just decided to bring out of hiding last night..(I heard them as she brought them out into the wide open spaces of the garden around 2 in the morning) ..ran under the car and hid in the wheels! No way to shift them,not even with sticks..it was sqash 'em or stay at home..(If it had been an emergency I would have done more..but tossing up wether to frighten the little blighters so early on in their career or get the medecine later..I opted for the latter.)
That's all right..I'll just stay calm ..go back in and print the stuff out for Rashida about EFT. Ay Dios! ..I'm printing the stuff out when.. in the middle of looking at the Technorati information again..the bloody thing sticks at page 17 and Bilquis decides to talk to meabout how interesting the book about transcending the ego is..and especially the bits from Ken Wilber..
Now Bilquis and I have a pretty good relationship..but there are times when I wish we had better conversations..really communicating about some of the things that ,in the end we have in common. I reckon we've had those books for about three years now.. I got them for her so she might be reading something inSpanish around the subjects which interest us..I have been seeing Ken Wilber's stuff on the shelves of the library in the Buddhist centre for yonks..
Now she has to strike up conversation about it?!..
Ay! ..(of course in the background I am wondering..Is Sheikh sending me all this stuff for my silly cockiness in trying to drop my last bit of Islamic practice..praying fajr in the mornings which always helps to protect and make things a bit more harmonious?)
Well..dramas over..it's all sorted..The manual's printed out (not without printing out from page ten onwards,even though I set it to 17 ..) anyway Hemingway..this is life..
The kittens mew outside on the grass, lunch is ready..I'll do Sylvia's e.book later..I'll get more paper and ink this afternoon..and get the medecine too..along with all the other stuff..and..well..I'm sure I'll find my way through Technorati and new topics in the forum in the end..maybe even contact Mushtaq Ali or whatever his name is ..even if I am an over-cerebral wimp according to his style of life..!
Every blogger has his own style..every individual has his own life and triumphs and disasters .. everyone is a child of God..and,as the Prophet said PBUH .. there are as many paths to God as there are breaths of men....
- posted by longgone1 @ 5/04/2005 02:47:00 PM