A personal blog with Sufi overtones and content and EFT connections.
(Most of the photos are clickable to enlarge.)
About Me
- Name: longgone1
- Location: Dorset, United Kingdom
Come, come, whoever you are. Wanderer, worshipper, lover of leaving — it doesn't matter, Ours is not a caravan of despair. Come, even if you have broken your vow a hundred times, Come, come again, come.
April 2005
May 2005
November 2005
December 2005
February 2006
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Personal Stuff
Thursday, April 28, 2005
Whew .. again!
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
What a "tour de force" !New printer and it's installation..mm hmm ..well..O.K. .. but perhaps my old lappie is a bit slow because it has only got a Pentium two chip and .. now that I want to muck around with photos ... anyway ,we'll see.
Printed out some nice one's of Sheikh last night from Kemal's site..Really not too bad..for 65 euros.
Somehow the connection went down last night and I had all the frustration of getting it back again this morning.Ending up with simply turning the modem off and back on..ahaaa! .. that did it...(no it didn't ..Sheikh did..)
Anyway it's all about connections (turning them off and back on again to re-new them..etc etc ) of course I just 'happened' to come across something about Murakaba ..which I needed Adobe to read ..so now..I'll go and do that then .. right then! (I'll do that then...or..now..)
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/28/2005 10:34:00 AM 0 comments
Wednesday, April 27, 2005
"The Friend."
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
Personal stuff,personal God. Allah "The Friend." At last! Thanks.
Written to Pete at last also..and to Tom at last also..and to Pandora/Dora/Barbie on the forum ..
Funny how one sees oneself when one writes to others..All leads back to Him..with greater and greater speed and intensity.Must go and pray now.
"The Friend." would be an attractive name for a Blog ..or a website or magazine,no?
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/27/2005 06:24:00 AM 0 comments
Monday, April 25, 2005
Allah/dad/love and encouragement.
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
O.K. Come on Allah,be kind to me.Bring on that warm pleasant feeling that really You love me..Even if I didn't have a dad that did ..."Even though my father was old and distant ...and hardly showed me love and encouragement ... etc"
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/25/2005 08:24:00 PM 0 comments
Images again.
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
Once again got hooked on those old images..(I do like photography and painting)
Knowing that I am wasting time..valuable time..The hour glass of my life is running out and here I am pissing around at this stuff.However..as Sheikh pointed out I could use a certain talent I have to write something and do photos around Islamic/sufi stuff.
I will,Insha'llah,I will. I just have to be convinced about what I am doing and why.After a good old session and dose of Ibn Arabi recently I feel more convinced again..more conviction again. Ho,hoo!
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/25/2005 07:45:00 PM 0 comments
After-siesta blues.
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
Phew! .... or Whew! or ... I don't know what. Just been out there in the blogosphere .. is it just me or is the world full of bored intelligent people with meaningless lives somehow missing the point and sort of trying to impress each other with sly humour and a "cooler than thou" attitude?
Does anything mean anything any more?
I suppose I've just got that afternoon sloozy mush-head craziness that makes everything seem a bit wierd. Or maybe there's some truth in it?..I wonder if I could find some "sincere" blogs? People looking for meaning and goodness in their lives.I'm sure all the people that make all those swanky clever blogs are better people than I am anyway..with their families and friends..children cats and dogs etc ..
Shee-it! what is the matter with me? Nothing I guess..it's just my way of being..
EFT EFT EFT ..but I haven't recently ..probably because the pain has been at a low "SUDS" What did it stand for again?
Can't bring myself to reply to those e.mails..somehow I should do it for them I suppose..at least acknowledge that Ive recieved them.
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/25/2005 06:53:00 PM 0 comments
Sunday, April 24, 2005
Signs and admonitions.
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
Just a little silly bit in here on a personal level.When I went to put the milk in my tea this morning I had to get a new packet down from the cupboard and noticed that it said on it.."Champions in 2012." Now that I've asked Bilquis what it is all about..it seems that it something to do with the Olympics which one supposes they will be holding here then (?) To me it was directly connected in my mind with 2012 as the date on which we will (hopefully!) go into the "New Era.".The end of the Mayan calendar and the end of the Venus Transit 2004 to 2012.
I certainly had some pretty strong experiences when that big Star of David appeared in the heavens .. the Star gate as some people called it then. If it was aprecursor to what is going to happen ..then ..Hip Hip Hooray!
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/24/2005 11:02:00 AM 0 comments
Saturday, April 23, 2005
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
So,now what? I've set up me little computer set-up again.Being with Him/in Him..remembering Him as much as possible as the only refuge,the only Reality,all the time..is what it is all about..Knowing that nothing else can possible bring any satisfaction.
Jamal told me yesterday that the 'Kaban' (clan tribe,whatever) in the Mayan calendar thing ,which he is and I am,according to them..traduces through the heart chakra..they/we are the ones who collect all that information..(head) but put it out through the heart.
I would like to think of that as my job..even here on the old Blog..buzzing around collecting quotes and references..and then sticking them on here.
"Blah Blah Blog. (A collection of quotes,references and personal thoughts on the Omnipresent ,Transcendent and Immanent Reality.)"
And why not? ..an eighth one though?
I suppose what I am doing is trying to find/create an identity ..a job ..something useful to do..that I would really not mind others coming and having a look at ..i.e. that I really believed in and wouldn't feel ashamed of or embarrassed about.
Why should I always feel embarrassed or ashamed of myself? Because I had such a terrible time when I was a kid and they screwed me up so bad? (In which case EFT is the only thing I know of that can help me...and in which case it is not justified .. only a psychological malfunction) .. Or,because I really am such a bad one..lazy and selfish and proud.(In which case I'm not so sure where to begin but by turning to a personal God for help and praying to Him Almighty and Omnipotent to help me to be better..and try to be more humble,and believe that praying..in an Islamic form for instance,really helps..both to clean me and to access His forgiveness... And to listen to my conscience.)
Anyway ..for now..because I can't really be completely objective about any of this..and ,like most things in life,it is most probably not completely one thing or the other...I will continue,for the moment,with Islam as my basic 'form' or religion and EFT to help me with all my layers of emotional and mental crap and programming and my own...(but which is obviously universal and archetypal) .. belief in
God in everything and evrything in God.. basically.
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/23/2005 08:39:00 AM 0 comments
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
There is no refuge from God but in God ..there is no refuge from the Absolute but in the Absolute ...
Maybe that one word..Absolute,free of any religious definitions or distinctions,
can help me to ... be with my God .. The One ... The All ..
I can go on and on searching for quotes and masters that said .. etc etc .. but I still do believe that He/It .. is everywhere and in everything ..
What I want is just to be with Him..with that thing all the time floating,or swimming in Mercy Oceans,as SheikhNazim would say.
Fear ..where does this fear of Him come from then?..is it natural fear projected onto or associated with,Allah as described or projected in Islam?..
Or is it really fear of an objective Reality,called Allah? .. Why do I feel fearful when I go to Hindu scriptures,or reading Vivakananda .. but feel O.K. and justified when I read virtually the same ideas and explanations in Ibn Arabi?
At the end of the day ..the "Traditionalist" thing from Rene Guenon may have it..that while knowing the central mystical Truth common to all religions..one must take a path ...
Then,don't I have to admit that I am just lazy and selfish ..proud and undisciplined ..? Or is it that I am not really sure of Islam / the Prophet PBUH? ..or even Sheikh Nazim for that matter.
100% one can only really be sure of God Almighty Himself ..or The Absolute.
That name,word,or expression may be the best for me..to just turn off my mind and Be with ....(It) ..or (once again,as I 'discovered' all those years ago) .. just"Be".
The Absolute ..All ideas and paths ..and yet none of them ..Beyond all ..
The idea of transcendence..when one has realised the dual nature of the mind and its creation of one's reality then,the Truth is not somewhere in between or a mixture of both but another reality .. a non-ordinary reality ... which .. according to all accounts and ..to 'logic' ... is (perhaps while including all the rest) completely different ..
That is what one wants to get to ..beyond all this petty duality and yes and no and better and worse and like and dislike etc etc ..
Sitting,being,feeling the pulsating God in all and,maybe especially,in ourselves..
Isn't that what I am so afraid of,to admit and know and believe that I also am God?..that I really do not exist ..that only He exists.
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/23/2005 07:18:00 AM 0 comments
Friday, April 22, 2005
All the crap.
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
That's it then..It seems like I've got all the crap back on again. What?Blogger,of course,AVG.ZoneLabs.All my shortcuts on the desktop.Now Picasa and Hello.Got me new 40Gb disk.Need to get that camera soon and do me own fotas ..and ..maybe a good printer scanner copier..or not..perhaps I'll just get the 65 euro one for now... and do that stuff for Rashida..wait for the 179 one or the 110 one..179 was HP1610 ..I'll have a look at some reviews maybe..
If I want to do something .. I better do the photos ..and the writing..that'll make me feel less of a w...er ...and that's it.
Set up a project and do it..despite all the esoteric stuff from Nis etc..
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/22/2005 09:36:00 PM 0 comments
Wednesday, April 20, 2005
Self doubt.
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
I've already said it..so now I've done a bit of EFT on it ..see what happens..touched an emotional sore spot there anyway..
Self doubt?..How could I not be full of self-doubt,the way they treated me! ? Is what comes to mind..comes bubbling through ..all that pain and hurting and sadness and confusion..and then anger at that ../ them ..anger at the ones I loved and who should have been loving me..never gave me the chance to love..in the middle of all that pain and war-zone..of course I just closed off to love and loving...
and then the tears come again ...
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/20/2005 08:57:00 AM 0 comments
Absolute God Personal God Creator God.
He's that one ...i.e. the absolute essence which we cannot think on to which the Advaitins refer and would like to take to us directly.. (and why not .. if one has the strength and it is not delusion or impertinence?) ..and He's all the other things like Creator and so on.. as well as we are really That One and and have no real reality of our own (which would be shirk as Ibn Arabi points out ) ..so-o-o ..that means that I'm still Muslim then? ..Still knowing and believing that Islamic sufism is the best ..and that ..as it would be impossible to be in existence without Muhammad SAWS .. then I must believe in him too! ... Yeah!
If this didn't have that element of self doubt in it ..it could be over on Sufi Stuff teaching or informing people instead of here on Personal Stuff..questioning everything.
That makes way for an article/post on EFT Stuff about .."Even though I have this self doubt..."
..because ..as Sheikh has pointed out ..one cannot really believe in God unless one believes in oneself (one's self) ... one Self ..
"It's all one you know."
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/20/2005 08:20:00 AM 0 comments
Tuesday, April 19, 2005
"Whoso knoweth himself..." Ibn Arabi.
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
After explaining that there is really nothing in existence except Allah..and therefore there is nothing to know Him except Himself by Himself through Himself ....I reckon I better put this on the Oneness site hadn't I? ... Use the link at the side at the top to go to ONENESS blog.
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/19/2005 06:27:00 PM 0 comments
40Gb. and shariat.
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
I've just been awoken from the siesta by a phone call from Ruben..yes it is the disc which is damaged..but he can put a new 40Gb one in for me for about 120 euros ..that's much better for me anyway as I have just started to do all that stuff with photos.. I could also get a new battery for it and then things would really start to look better.
As for all the questions about advaita vedanta and sufism ..the thing which makes me wonder..is the question of the shariat..I mean I know Hinduism has it's rules and regs..and that basically it seems as if the advaitins are Shivaistas.. .. but ..well,just look at the power of the prophets..doesn't that tell us something?.What is it?..Approximately 6000 million people in the world..of which 3000 million are Christians and 2000 million Muslims..? Something like that (I'd have to check the figures.. but its roughly right I think) ..two thousand years later and all those people still following Jesus even if Paul did screw up his message for him../for us ..1,500 years and all those people still following Muhammad SAWS .. that is not the power of ordinary people or even enlightened people ..That is the power of prophets!..Yes..I know all those arguments like "Eat shit ten thousand million flies can't be wrong." etc ..but we are not flies.. we are human beings with very wayward egos..blah blah blah.
Anyway,I have to finish off sorting out the kiwi which I have been cutting back all the old dead wood on and also phone Ruben to make sure if he can give me the software (like Office and all that)..I reckon so ..he's done a copy of Windows 98 for me before with no trouble.
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/19/2005 05:53:00 PM 0 comments
Absolute God,Impersonal/Personal God.Both?
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
Too much thinking..I'm tired now. That story remains to be written.I should write three or four e.mails. One to Pete ..one to Tom Richardson,one to Kemal Karadevut and one to abdl Majid.
One non sufi (in Islamic terms) one more 'universal' sufi.. and two Naqshbandis.
O.K.
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/19/2005 07:36:00 AM 0 comments
Sufi advaita vedantin.
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
O.K. I'm doing a new post (even though it does come out in the wrong order) ..becauseBlogger can screw up and so can my old machine.
Eventually I am going to have to return to the story of my spiritual path from its beginnings,as I was doing some days back.Was it on this blog?..probably (I'll go back and look and see what I can sort out).
I suppose one could say that it is about thequestion of a personal God ..and,probably about upbringing and early imprinting/patterning.
I hope,to resolve it all,we are all moving into a new age where Truth,spirituality and Love will be the motivating and prevailing forces and that individual religions will either be totally acceptable to one and all or completely unnecessary and superceded by a new consciousness.
(Please God!)
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/19/2005 07:17:00 AM 0 comments
Advaita Vedanta.
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
When I read about Advaita Vedanta it is like coming home. Here is a link to a simple good and knowledgeable article about it on the Global Oneness site.http://www.experiencefestival.com/a/VedantaSchools/id/23127 K?
What am I going to do about practice?That is the question. Twenty years with Sheikh Nazim ..twenty two in Islam ..Now what? .. Maybe I need to go into this to come out of it.Maybe I need to clarify my ideas ../mind ../ conscience ..fears?
Can I be both sufi Muslim and Advaita Vedantin?
The Truth is one , one and the same..(or not the same as soon as we start to think..but in essence..must be the same..) When we go to the ultimate end of knowledge ..which is what advaita vedanta is ..then it must be the same as what Allah truly is (in Himself ..i.e. in His esssence..) The Sheikh teaches that all of this world is just a shadow show ..(Maya ..the veil of Maya) ..the Prophet himself said "Know yourself and you will know your Lord." .. how can that be if one's true self and one's Lord are not the same thing? ..
It's the worship bit of sufism which is a bit strange ..off-putting even ..It is the outer Islamic rules and regulations which I have been trying to convince myself for so long about,that put everybody off Islam ..apart from its agressive war-like image.
I have drawn away from the Naqshbandi group for sometime now..it's methodology seeming to be to tear the ego away from one like being flayed alive ..the flesh just ripped off the bones..Frankly it is usually just too painful for me.Wether that is due to me looking in the mirror or just plain weakness I don't know. Could it be that I won't succumb to false stuff? I sometimes feel that there is too greater element of fear in the whole thing and is not fear directly connected with aggression?
I am going to post now before I lose this (the old machine is making some fairly grumpy grousy noises.)
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/19/2005 06:50:00 AM 0 comments
Monday, April 18, 2005
End of the day ...
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
Freedom,freedom from..from everything..to be,to do, ..nothing? .. everything .. No ... no concepts even. The telly is loud with the music of T Rex ..it's a film about a boy from the North of England who becomes a dancer .. Billy Eliot. I think it's quite good,but .. no... as usual .. not for me ..I better be ..patient.
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/18/2005 10:16:00 PM 0 comments
No more mind .. running dry.
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
The lappie is in with Ruben to be looked at and mended hopefully insha'llah..but,if not,then not..He's pretty efficient and intelligent and it may not have so much wrong with it .. If it does..that is in Allah's hands.. I mean,I shall try to accept whatever comes and look on the bright side. I've already been looking at some sites in the U.K. which have second hand and refurbished lap tops that are very reasonably priced .. nearly new ..blah blah blah..off into imagination again.. ... It's just that I enjoy writing and I am looking for something to prattle about .. but really,apart from the fact that it is so unimportant ..(except to me) it is all imagination and that is what I am working on a bit..at one level,at least not projecting negative futures,at the next level ... not projecting futures at all!.
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/18/2005 07:16:00 PM 0 comments
Saturday, April 16, 2005
A Brand New Day!
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
Today is a brand new day and I am surrounded by gifts,both within and outside of myself,it's just incredible!
I suppose what I have to say should be divided up between EFT Stuff and Sufi Stuff , but I don't know if all those things are so seperate now.
I think something deep and important has occurred with the EFT and it has freed me off for a much more positive and joyful experience with my worship of God Almighty Allah.
I took a quick look at the night sky before I prayed fajr...I can see so much more of it from the balcony now that I have pruned the avocado and the grape vine.Oh wow! ... So hu-u-u-ge! so beautiful! so de-e-e-p! so perfect,so delicate,so vast..
what words can describe the universe? The Milky Way and all the other sprinkled stars and constellations ..unbelievable..and some people are going to try to tell me that it is an accident?! ...
My voice was different when I chanted "la ilaha ila 'llah"..and when I read sura Ya Sin and when I chanted (almost sang) the Hundred Names ..really happily praising that One ..o-o-o-h! ... Yes the night sky is so beautiful ..but imagine the One that created it! ..The One Who created Beauty.. Who is Beauty!
Allah is The Beautiful and He loves Beauty ..Ya Jamil!
Yes,women are the most beautiful things inthe world..didn't Allah create Eve from Adam to make him happy when he found himself alone in Paradise? Surrounded by everything he liked in complete happiness and pleasure ..but..alone..so Allah created Eve for him ..
What are we without our mates? ...Bu-u-t ... thay mustn't distract us from Him Almighty .. the danger is,given the nature of the nafs(ego) that we will make A god (or goddess if you like) out of them and..veil ourselves from the love of Allah Almighty ..and then we are lost!
So-o .. enough for here for now ..If I can I will try to encapsulate some of what has been happening with the EFT thing over on EFT Stuff.
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/16/2005 07:44:00 AM 0 comments
Friday, April 15, 2005
Photo relief.
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
Well,to relieve some of the boredom/depre ..I took a look at photography,esp B&W on Google images ... some of the results (all from one site) are on Pictures and Writings.(click on link to see them).
Funnily enough there was some stuff on BBC Front Page about their use of images and matching captions.
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/15/2005 06:44:00 PM 0 comments
Mental Health.
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
Because I have been feeling down again..(despite thinking that I was making great strides forward with the EFT) ..I just put the words "mental health" into Google,it's been playing up a bit so I tried the Images search and came up with this..
Minding Your Mental Health™
Section I - Mental Health Facts
Characteristics of Mental Health
Mental health is more than just the absence of mental illness. It includes how you feel about yourself and how you adjust to life events. However, the National Mental Health Association cites 10 characteristics of people who are mentally healthy.
1)They feel good about themselves.
2)They do not become overwhelmed by emotions, such as fear, anger, love, jealousy, guilt, or anxiety.
3)They have lasting and satisfying personal relationships.
4)They feel comfortable with other people.
5)They can laugh at themselves and with others.
6)They have respect for themselves and for others even if there are differences.
7)They are able to accept life’s disappointments.
8)They can meet life’s demands and handle their problems when they arise.
9)They make their own decisions.
10)They shape their environment whenever possible and adjust to it when necessary.
As I do not display one of the above characteristics...I'm a bit worried about myself!
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/15/2005 04:56:00 PM 0 comments
Nuttin'
Bismi'llah arRahman arRahim. There is no refuge from Allah but in Him.
Don't feel like nuttin' really.Dee-e-e-e-p tiredness .. tiredness with life perhaps?
Who cares?..Just been out there looking around the other blogs ..Blogorreah ..has loads of links to others ..Pcha! ...
I'm a bit bored with it all really.
- posted by longgone1 @ 4/15/2005 12:38:00 PM 0 comments
